Stop Waiting
I've been anxious the past few days because I've been praying so hard to be in Sales. I love my job now, but I really think I could do better in Sales, closing deals and everything... My parents worked as sales people in their respective companies (that were both media-related) not too long ago, so I would like to think that media-marketing and sales really run in my blood. (HAH, yabang eh, noh?) Since the 2nd week of my time here in Groupon, I've constantly been praying to be moved to full-time work and to the sales department. After all, I've already settled in my heart that I won't be studying anymore since I've to prepare to leave for the States. But while that's taking some time, why not spend a few months working?
Day after day, I pleaded and pleaded for God place me "wherever He wanted me to be" but in the depths of my heart I was hoping He wanted me elsewhere.
Finally, I just stopped kidding myself and opened my heart to His will in my life -- that I'd be excellent wherever He places me, whether in sales or editorial. That His best was not yet to come, as Bing, my discipler would often remind me, His best is and always will be Jesus here, now. So I just did what I could in editorial. I did my writeups, made friends- even with my boss and made the most of my time there. My desire never left, I still wanted to go to sales, but in my heart I was content because I knew I was wherever God wanted me to be - where He would be able to use me most.
AND THEEEEEN. Yesterday, around 2 in the afternoon, I was finally able to chat with my boss, the Country Manager (aka President) about the matter and she finally moved me to full-time work! Everything happened so fast: first it was just a meeting for editorial incentives, and next thing I knew, she was asking me what I wanted to do and we were making our way to the HR dept to make the arrangements. All I could think was "WOW LORD."
I remember a few months back, in Dgroup, Bing was telling us something about waiting. That every kind of waiting (not just the ones about GBs) is waiting on God. A heart that waits is a heart that does not fret. And it's not just a passive kind of waiting, wherein I sit pretty and just expect blessings to come along. Waiting on the Lord involves a lot of work -- it involves a lot of time of NOT waiting. It seems to me that the more my heart "waits", the more it seems to feel anxious and the more I wish that the waiting season be over and done with. It's funny to think that's how most Christian teens think these days: they're too caught up on the whole WAITING thing, but the stillness is not the point. The point is, it's an exciting time with the Lover of your soul.
A flood of examples rush through my head, Adam never complained he was lonely. The word "lonely" never even occurred to him, but God brought Eve along at a time he wasn't even expecting her. Rebekah, Jacob's GB was just doing her morning chores when Isaac's servant boy came to pick her up. Queen Esther never made sudden moves before the king for the salvation of her people. But she remained patient and obedient to her cousin Mordecai and justice was eventually served. Most people don't get this because their minds are often clouded, thinking about the suffering they go through while waiting. With a mindset like that, they probably never will.
I thought to myself, "If I could wait out moving to the States by keeping myself busy with work and spending time with Jesus, why can't I seem to do the same on the other things in my life?"
One perfect illustration I recall is one I heard a while back, also in Dgroup. It's about two brothers, who woke up one morning to find a huge rock in front of their house. Puzzled, they prayed to God and asked what they should do with it. In a loud, thundering voice, the Lord replied "Push against the rock". The two brothers obeyed immediately and pushed. They pushed and pushed but the rock wouldn't budge. Night came and both brothers retreated back to the comfort of their home and called it a day. The next morning however, they picked up where they left off and pushed against the rock. Day in and day out, they pushed and pushed, but the rock wouldn't move. Months passed and Brother A decided he's had enough. He gave up and went back inside the house. Brother B though was determined to keep pushing. Another few months passed by and finally Brother B was frustrated. With fists in the air, he complained to God.
So this was what Daddy was trying to tell me a few days back.
I've decided that I've had enough of throwing waiting pity-parties. Imma stop waiting and start working -- and being gosh-darn excellent at it.
Day after day, I pleaded and pleaded for God place me "wherever He wanted me to be" but in the depths of my heart I was hoping He wanted me elsewhere.
Finally, I just stopped kidding myself and opened my heart to His will in my life -- that I'd be excellent wherever He places me, whether in sales or editorial. That His best was not yet to come, as Bing, my discipler would often remind me, His best is and always will be Jesus here, now. So I just did what I could in editorial. I did my writeups, made friends- even with my boss and made the most of my time there. My desire never left, I still wanted to go to sales, but in my heart I was content because I knew I was wherever God wanted me to be - where He would be able to use me most.
AND THEEEEEN. Yesterday, around 2 in the afternoon, I was finally able to chat with my boss, the Country Manager (aka President) about the matter and she finally moved me to full-time work! Everything happened so fast: first it was just a meeting for editorial incentives, and next thing I knew, she was asking me what I wanted to do and we were making our way to the HR dept to make the arrangements. All I could think was "WOW LORD."
I remember a few months back, in Dgroup, Bing was telling us something about waiting. That every kind of waiting (not just the ones about GBs) is waiting on God. A heart that waits is a heart that does not fret. And it's not just a passive kind of waiting, wherein I sit pretty and just expect blessings to come along. Waiting on the Lord involves a lot of work -- it involves a lot of time of NOT waiting. It seems to me that the more my heart "waits", the more it seems to feel anxious and the more I wish that the waiting season be over and done with. It's funny to think that's how most Christian teens think these days: they're too caught up on the whole WAITING thing, but the stillness is not the point. The point is, it's an exciting time with the Lover of your soul.
A flood of examples rush through my head, Adam never complained he was lonely. The word "lonely" never even occurred to him, but God brought Eve along at a time he wasn't even expecting her. Rebekah, Jacob's GB was just doing her morning chores when Isaac's servant boy came to pick her up. Queen Esther never made sudden moves before the king for the salvation of her people. But she remained patient and obedient to her cousin Mordecai and justice was eventually served. Most people don't get this because their minds are often clouded, thinking about the suffering they go through while waiting. With a mindset like that, they probably never will.
I thought to myself, "If I could wait out moving to the States by keeping myself busy with work and spending time with Jesus, why can't I seem to do the same on the other things in my life?"
One perfect illustration I recall is one I heard a while back, also in Dgroup. It's about two brothers, who woke up one morning to find a huge rock in front of their house. Puzzled, they prayed to God and asked what they should do with it. In a loud, thundering voice, the Lord replied "Push against the rock". The two brothers obeyed immediately and pushed. They pushed and pushed but the rock wouldn't budge. Night came and both brothers retreated back to the comfort of their home and called it a day. The next morning however, they picked up where they left off and pushed against the rock. Day in and day out, they pushed and pushed, but the rock wouldn't move. Months passed and Brother A decided he's had enough. He gave up and went back inside the house. Brother B though was determined to keep pushing. Another few months passed by and finally Brother B was frustrated. With fists in the air, he complained to God.
"Lord naman! Here I am, I've been obedient and faithful to You, pushing against this rock, just like You told me to, but it won't move. What gives, Lord? Nahihirapan na ako dito. Can't You just move the rock or make it lighter so it'd be easier to push?"But God replied,
"Ikaw talaga, anak. I've seen your efforts and how you have continued to obey Me inspite of your brother giving up... And look at you now, you have grown strong these few past months that you've kept on, while your brother was as weak as the day I asked you to start pushing. You see, I never asked you to push against the rock for you to move it. I had to push against the rock to make you STRONG."
So this was what Daddy was trying to tell me a few days back.
I've decided that I've had enough of throwing waiting pity-parties. Imma stop waiting and start working -- and being gosh-darn excellent at it.
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